Spider-Man: Homecoming – Quotes
Tony Stark: Don’t do anything I would do, and definitely don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. There is a little grey window in there for you to operate.
Teacher: See, Flash—being the fastest isn’t always the best if you are wrong.
Michelle: I’m not obsessed with him, I’m just very observant.
Storekeeper: How’s your Aunt? (Aside: She’s a very hot Italian woman.)
Peter: She’s great… How’s your neice?
Operator: 911 – what’s your emergency?
Caller: Uh…Spiderman is fighting the Avengers in a bank.
Ned: Ok, I’ll level with you. I don’t think I can keep this a secret right now. This is the coolest thing that’s ever happened to me.
Ned: How do you do this and the Stark internship?
Peter: This IS the Stark internship.
Ned: Do you lay eggs?… Can you spit venom?… How far can you shoot your webs? … Can you summon an army of spiders?… Is Captain America cool or is he like a mean old grandpa?
Peter: Spiderman is not a party trick. I’m just gonna be myself.
Ned: Nobody wants that!
Tony Stark: Can’t you just be a friendly neighborhood Spider-Man now?
Peter: But I’m ready for more!
Peter: Come on man, I don’t need training wheels.
Peter: Mr. Stark treats me like a kid!
Ned: You are a kid.
Peter: Yeah, a kid who can stop a bus with his bare hands! … I could do so much more!
Suit (Karen): Would you like to change to enhanced combat mode?
Suit (Karen): Switching to kill mode.
Peter: Wait! No! I don’t want to kill anyone.
Suit (Karen): Deactivating enhanced combat mode.
Peter on being afraid: I’ve never been this high before.
Suit (Karen): You’ve also not reinstalled your parachute so a fall from this height would most likely be lethal.
Ned: You want to be a high school drop out?
Peter: Dude, I am so far beyond high school now.
Suit (Karen): I record everything you see… it’s called the Baby Monitor Protocol.
Criminal on Peter’s interrogation and intimidation technique: You’ve got to get better at this part of the job.
Peter: I’m intimidating!
Peter about his web handcuffs: That’ll dissolve in two hours… You deserve this!
Criminal: No, I have ice cream!
Peter: You’re a criminal!
Criminal: You told the guy, “If you wanna shoot someone, shoot me.” That’s ballsy.
Tony: Nice job in DC. My dad never really did so good with praise. I’m just trying to break the cycle of shame.
Tony: This is where you zip it. The adult is talking.
Peter: I just wanted to be like you.
Tony: And I just wanted you to be better.
Tony: I’m the only one who believed in you. You’re young. You barely know how the world works.
Tony: If you’re nothing without this suit, then you shouldn’t have it.
Adrian: Hey Pedro!
Tony: Sorry I took your suit. Thurns out, it was the perfect tough love moment for you… right? Let’s just say that it was.
Tony: You screwed the pooch, but then you did the right thing and took the pooch to the clinic and raised the hybrid puppies … Admittedly not my best analogy.